Do It Anyway

Day +9. The mouth is not as sore as before. This is very strange. It is meant to get worse before it gets better. So much for my saying, “pump up the positives” yesterday. I seem to always fear the worse. Maybe Lesley-Ann is right, I like playing the martyr. It was a disturbed sleep last night. The blood counts continue to drop, the platelets are now down to 11. I was told that I will have no energy, feel exhausted  and so on. Why am I not there? Where does this energy come from? I have been in a room (about 10×14) for nearly three weeks now. I don’t see anyone in the outside world except for the nurses, doctors and the family. I don’t watch TV or listen to the radio, but my day seems to be full. My spirits are high and I am in good form. I asked for a miracle, and the miracle is what I am experiencing right now! Thank you for your prayers and support.

I am invited to talk about my entrepreneurial journey to students. Usually I use a title like “Entrepreneurship & Leadership: Lessons Learnt”. I generally end my talk by quoting this poem that is supposed to have been on Mother Theresa’s wall. I aspire to this:

People are often unreasonable,
illogical and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind,
people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful,
you will win some false friends and true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank,
people may cheat you;
Be honest anyway.

What you spend years building,
someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness,
they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today,
people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have,
and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis,
it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.

Tomorrow I’ll write about the alternative treatments that I looked at. That’s all for now folks!

3 replies on “Do It Anyway”

No, my blood counts are too low for me to even leave my room. It’ll be another week or so for the donor cells to start producing the new white cells that will give me the immunity. My white cell count has been at 0.1 for the last few days and the normal range is between 4-9. They are closely monitoring a particular white blood cell count, called the neutrophil count. Neutrophils are the most abundant type of white blood cells in us and form an essential part of the innate immune system. My neutrophil count is at zero. No doubt I will miss the physical aspects of the day such as our church service, family Christmas dinner, hugs and board games. Though I trust the spirit of Christmas will be alive with me during these next few days.

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